Thank you for this astute analysis of HR. I've watched it twice and will undoubtedly watch again. I also bought the books. I can't get enough of them and their story. I wonder what your thoughts are re: why this series has become a favorite for many straight people as well. The acclaim, beyond the queer community, is phenomenal. Thanks again!
Good question. I reckon it lands because it’s not “gay content,” but rather intimacy under pressure. The kind of wanting that’s messy, defensible, and painfully human, so straight viewers just swap the hockey for their own high stakes arena. Also, it refuses the usual tidy morality play and gives people what they secretly crave: desire with consequences, tenderness without a lecture. 😊
… I’m watching cis-women go gaga for it. If I had to guess, I would say that women enjoy seeing the softer, less threatening side of men in romance. Though this series does show the performative public masculinity .
You’re right, and I’d add one more spicy layer: it gives cis women “men being emotional” without the usual gendered labour cost, since nobody’s turning to the woman to translate feelings or manage the relationship. Also, two men let the romance be intense without sliding into the straight script where the woman has to be the brakes, the therapist, and the moral centre. 😅
That’s the dark magic of it: when tenderness feels risky, aggression becomes the only socially permitted doorway to contact. The upgrade is learning you can want without needing to bruise something first. 👍
Different arena, same choreography: rivalry as camouflage for wanting. Once you spot it, you can choose whether it’s still protection or just old habit. Thanks for sharing.
Watch it for the psychology, not the hockey or steamy scenes. 😄 It’s less “sports romance” and more a case study in how wanting gets translated into performance when being ordinary still feels unsafe, and that part lands even if your life looked nothing like theirs.
Gino, Was a great analysis of the show. A little different for me because I have had, an out 50 year (althought not all that time) relationship built on love, trust, understanding, respect, and more. There was no rivalry but that doesn't mean I haven't enjoyed it while watching the show. Also, to see such intimate sexuality on a TV screen (not video tape or CD porno) is amazing. While things have once again been difficult for QUEER Folks, this does show we have "come a long way baby!" Thanks for your close look at this phenomenon. Fondly, Michael
Fifty years of building something that doesn’t need secrecy is the real flex here. 😊 And yes, seeing intimacy on a mainstream screen matters, but I’d say the bigger win is tenderness without punishment, which still feels oddly subversive in 2026.
Thank you for this astute analysis of HR. I've watched it twice and will undoubtedly watch again. I also bought the books. I can't get enough of them and their story. I wonder what your thoughts are re: why this series has become a favorite for many straight people as well. The acclaim, beyond the queer community, is phenomenal. Thanks again!
Good question. I reckon it lands because it’s not “gay content,” but rather intimacy under pressure. The kind of wanting that’s messy, defensible, and painfully human, so straight viewers just swap the hockey for their own high stakes arena. Also, it refuses the usual tidy morality play and gives people what they secretly crave: desire with consequences, tenderness without a lecture. 😊
Right?
… I’m watching cis-women go gaga for it. If I had to guess, I would say that women enjoy seeing the softer, less threatening side of men in romance. Though this series does show the performative public masculinity .
Gino, thought?
You’re right, and I’d add one more spicy layer: it gives cis women “men being emotional” without the usual gendered labour cost, since nobody’s turning to the woman to translate feelings or manage the relationship. Also, two men let the romance be intense without sliding into the straight script where the woman has to be the brakes, the therapist, and the moral centre. 😅
No emotional labor required. Perfect.
There is this line I read in Psycho-Cybernetics a little while ago and I fell in love with it. It goes like:
"A man can't feel affection if he doesn't have an outlet for aggression."
But I didn't realize how one could morph into the other in places where the other is impossible to exist.
Great read, G.
That’s the dark magic of it: when tenderness feels risky, aggression becomes the only socially permitted doorway to contact. The upgrade is learning you can want without needing to bruise something first. 👍
My rivalry wasn't on the ice or on the football field. But it was there all the same.
Different arena, same choreography: rivalry as camouflage for wanting. Once you spot it, you can choose whether it’s still protection or just old habit. Thanks for sharing.
Brilliant deep dive. There’s so much here, I don’t even know what to comment on. lol
Stay small in the margins where we were told we belong. That hits reality for us all.
Because this was never my path, I’m thoroughly enjoying you’re laying it out so concisely and cleanly.
I have not seen the show yet. I wasn’t sure it was for me, but your post makes me curious about its depiction of our reality.
Watch it for the psychology, not the hockey or steamy scenes. 😄 It’s less “sports romance” and more a case study in how wanting gets translated into performance when being ordinary still feels unsafe, and that part lands even if your life looked nothing like theirs.
Yeah, I’ve come to exactly that conclusion also. I need to watch it just for the psychology.
(That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. lol )
Perfect cover story, totally defensible in court. 😄
Gino, Was a great analysis of the show. A little different for me because I have had, an out 50 year (althought not all that time) relationship built on love, trust, understanding, respect, and more. There was no rivalry but that doesn't mean I haven't enjoyed it while watching the show. Also, to see such intimate sexuality on a TV screen (not video tape or CD porno) is amazing. While things have once again been difficult for QUEER Folks, this does show we have "come a long way baby!" Thanks for your close look at this phenomenon. Fondly, Michael
Fifty years of building something that doesn’t need secrecy is the real flex here. 😊 And yes, seeing intimacy on a mainstream screen matters, but I’d say the bigger win is tenderness without punishment, which still feels oddly subversive in 2026.
This is brilliant. Thank you.